Starting to Sit with Some Help
Once your baby learns to sit, a whole new world of activities will open up for him. He’ll be able to reach for toys and pick them up, watch what's going on around him, and interact with you in a totally different way. It’s an amazing milestone, but, like all great achievements, it requires significant steps to get there.
Around three to four months, you may see some indications that your baby is interested in sitting. However, even if she’s interested, it’s only safe and appropriate to help her sit once she has adequate head and trunk control, which is usually around four to five months old.
It’s important to follow natural gross motor development, so it’s not recommended to prop your baby in a supported-sitting position before she’s ready. Research has shown that an infant should learn these skills when they’re physically ready — and not only for the benefits to her body. The psychological and cognitive work it takes to do adequate motor planning and sequencing during this development stage is also critical.
So there’s no need to rush! Take your time to make sure your little one has learned, mastered, and enjoyed the transitions and movement patterns leading up to this skill. Make sure they can roll, turn, twist, and reach. Once they’ve figured all that out, you can move on to sitting.
First, be sure your little one can control her head and trunk in midline. Your baby will practice this skill during tummy time, which is crucial for developing the strength to control and center her body. Keep at this effort, no matter how frustrating it might be for you both, and she’ll be able to keep her head centered on her body while she’s lifting it. During tummy time, she’ll also be working on strengthening her trunk. When reaching or lifting her arms, she’ll be controlling her trunk and engaging her back muscles. When moving from side-to-side, she’ll be strengthening her core and getting stronger. This step is essential for getting her body ready to sit.
If tummy time has been a challenge, try our tips for successful sessions or look into some of our favorite stimulating tummy time toys.
Once your baby has mastered tummy time with a steady head and a strong core, it’s time to help him sit. You can support him yourself or use a pillow to move into a supported sitting position. A pillow, like the Boppy or the Infantino go-gaga prop-a-pillar, will provide a low-level of stability, so your child can use her own trunk muscles and arms to assist herself. You should be able to tell that your child is working hard since true balance can only be achieved through practice!
In this and future sitting positions, it is typical for a baby to lean forward slightly when ring-sitting, with knees bent, legs curved outward, and feet together. Some children will cross their ankles or legs slightly in this position. Don’t expect perfect upright, school-kid posture yet! He’s just learning for the first time! Expecting or holding your baby in a “perfect” posture could result in them overextending their head and neck, instead of using the appropriate shoulder blade and spinal muscles for stability.
If you chose to hold your baby in a sitting position, be sure to hold his trunk instead of just his arms or hands. Holding his hands or arms without stabilizing his trunk will result in poor postural alignment and could cause injury to his shoulders or neck. When supporting his trunk, think about where your hands are. If they’re up in his armpits, is it because he needs a lot of help? Can you lower your hands to be closer to his hips?
Soon your baby will be able to sit in “tripod sitting”. In this sitting position, your baby will be able to sit on their own, but only when propped up on one or both arms extended in front of them. They haven’t quite made it to sitting independently yet, but this is an important step in the progress. It requires a great amount of trunk support and coordination on his part, and you can encourage him to work on this step by placing his arms in front of him while he sits in a supported position. As he gets more stable and confident, he may be able to play with an object in one hand while propping himself with the other!
Check out our product list that can make supported sitting easier and more fun.
All of these steps are important for helping your baby learn to sit, but sometimes a little direct, practical guidance is the most helpful. We’ve pulled together some activities to make the practice simpler and more fun:
Hold your baby on your lap. Have him sit on the middle of your thighs, straddling one or both legs, instead of against your torso. Begin by holding his trunk close to his armpits and slowly progress to holding lower, closer to his hips. You will notice as you lower your hands that he begins to wobble a little. Find a hand placement where he is safe and steady but also working to improve.
If your baby is being supported by a Boppy pillow, sit to his side, where you can easily use your hand to keep him safe. Hold a toy or picture at a comfortable angle for him to look forward and slightly down. Having him practice moving his head and eyes while sitting will further improve his balance systems.
Perhaps your baby is like our friend, Ava, and loves boat-pose and ab workouts and is too smart for the Boppy pillow. Ava and her mom, Amanda, worked hard at sitting and practiced by having Ava sit in a small laundry basket and a sturdy diaper box surrounded by soft balls, rolled socks, and soft toys.
What can you do if sitting is still very challenging, and your baby seems very unstable or doesn’t like it yet?
First, make sure she’s ready and safe. When you’re starting, make sure you keep an eye on the work your baby is doing, whether he’s safe, and how he’s positioned. If he’s struggling so much that he’s upset, it may not be time. If you spot significant rounding of the spine or that he’s having trouble lifting his head or straightening his back, it’s time to get back to tummy time and keep working on that skill. If she’s sitting with you and her neck and head are falling forward, she’s not ready for sitting and it will be an unsafe activity. If you notice any of these things in your baby, jump back into that core strengthening work during tummy time, strengthening the muscles down her neck, back, and bottom. Also, lying on his side while playing with toys will help solidify his midline orientation. Ultimately, having strong muscles along his spine and shoulder blades is vital to sitting successfully and battling gravity to stay upright.
Has your baby mastered supported sitting and is now ready to sit unsupported? Follow our sitting unsupported guide to help them with this next step.
Jessica is an experienced physical therapist passionate about early development, gross motor play, and improving daily function for those with neurological diagnoses. She earned her undergraduate degree in kinesiology from Michigan State University and her doctorate in physical therapy from Daemen College. Practicing for nearly seven years, Jessica has worked with children and families in hospital, outpatient, early intervention, school-based, and private clinical settings.
Jessica lives in northern Michigan, where she spends as much time as possible outside. She’s mom to five-month-old Declan and aunt to two energetic toddlers, two-year-old Tallulah and three-year-old Grayson.
